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Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.

Join us in talking discussing all things Honor, including (but not limited to) tactics, favorite characters, and book discussions.
Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Mon Dec 11, 2023 12:23 am

penny
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Shannon_Foraker wrote:
AdmiralStarNight wrote:Heres one for you, adaptation on an old joke:

One reason the different star nations have trouble getting along is that they don’t speak the same language.

For example, if you told Solarian personnel to “secure a building,” they would turn off the lights, lock the doors,and stop listening to what ever is happening outside.

Havenite personnel would occupy the building so no one could enter or leave. They'd also redecorate the building

Manticorians would assault the building, capture it, and defend it with Honor Harrington and Treecats.

The Andermani, on the other hand, would take out a three-year lease with an option to help the people of the building with their problems.


Maybe split up the Haven section?

CoPS (Committee of Public Safety)/StateSec personnel would occupy the building with StateSec so no one could enter or leave. They'd also redecorate the building with StateSec flags, and begin blasting Citizen Ransom's propaganda.

The PN (if they have a skilled CO (someone like Tourville, Theisman, Giscard or McQueen), and no Citzen Ransom watching their every move for her propaganda)would occupy the building with naval forces so no one could enter or leave, then add some defenses (not RMN class, obviously, but better than nothing), and do some redecoration, and try not to have StateSec or the RMN take it from them.

Republic of Haven edition

Shannon's people at Bolthole would occupy the building with naval forces so no one could enter or leave, being Havenites, but they would also move in and set up their R&D facility (if it's hidden like Bolthole is). They would not redecorate the building with StateSec flags, and begin blasting Citizen Ransom's propaganda, because their CO and the rest of the RHN isn't a fan of that (they fought a war, and had Shannon be a hacker to get rid of StateSec). If they redecorate, don't expect anything fancy or neat. There may be missing wristcoms that look like Vice Admiral Foraker's wristcom, and maybe some new tech toys (imagine running into Moriarty for the first time while mousetrapped like Solon, but at Bolthole, if Bolthole was in a grav wave).

The Mesan Alignment would leave a biiig hole in the ground.
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Mon Dec 11, 2023 6:46 am

penny
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Honor simply causes problems all-around

"Why don't we simply use nanites on her!"

"Nanites don't work on crazy people. Their neural pathways are wired differently. And her muscle memory is totally composed of killing the enemy. Even if we are successful at affecting her with compulsion, even while she is under she will continue to kill the enemy. That is all her muscle memory knows how to do. Plus, we have the added problem of determining her cycle. Salamanders get very slippery when wet."
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Mon Dec 18, 2023 8:38 pm

penny
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Manticore Binary System


Admiralty

"Again, why did we finally decide to give Harrington her first hyper-capable command?"

"Beta testing."
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Wed Dec 20, 2023 8:33 am

penny
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penny wrote:Manticore Binary System


Admiralty

"Again, why did we finally decide to give Harrington her first hyper-capable command?"

"Beta testing."

"And we will get beta testers for free. Actually, they will pay the cost."
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Fri Dec 22, 2023 11:53 am

penny
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penny wrote:
penny wrote:Manticore Binary System


Admiralty

"Again, why did we finally decide to give Harrington her first hyper-capable command?"

"Beta testing."

"And we will get beta testers for free. Actually, they will pay the cost."

Tourville was a beta tester twice. He found a flaw in the product during the first test that had been ironed out by the last.
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Sat Dec 23, 2023 5:52 am

penny
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I never thought beta-tester could become such a hazardous job. It can certainly be hazardous as hell in the HV. Honor even found beta-testers in Hell. It is a hell of a job, so why not.
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Sat Jan 06, 2024 9:02 am

penny
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The goose that lays the golden eggs


Honor's secret is out in the MA. Everyone wants telepathy. Her eggs have become the most sought after commodity in history. A dozen salamander eggs are priceless.

"They won't be easy to get."

"We just have to crack a few regular eggs to get them."

"Do we send our very best people?"

"Let's try six of one and half dozen of the other."

"Do you think her eggs are double yolk eggs? She is olive complexioned, you know. Brown eggs are oftentimes double yolk."

"You're an idiot, and a prime example of how garbage can slip into the Inner Onion."

Finally coming up against Honor.

"I sense your fear like a bunch of scared fowl," while drawing her .45. "We will finally answer the question, 'What comes first, you chickens or the eggs.' "
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Sun Jan 14, 2024 11:14 am

penny
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penny wrote:The goose that lays the golden eggs


Honor's secret is out in the MA. Everyone wants telepathy. Her eggs have become the most sought after commodity in history. A dozen salamander eggs are priceless.

"They won't be easy to get."

"We just have to crack a few regular eggs to get them."

"Do we send our very best people?"

"Let's try six of one and half dozen of the other."

"Do you think her eggs are double yolk eggs? She is olive complexioned, you know. Brown eggs are oftentimes double yolk."

"You're an idiot, and a prime example of how garbage can slip into the Inner Onion."

Finally coming up against Honor.

"I sense your fear like a bunch of scared fowl," while drawing her .45. "We will finally answer the question, 'What comes first, you chickens or the eggs.' "

"Damn. Harrington sure poached those eggs quickly."

"But they were six caged-eggs. We're a half-dozen of the more experienced free-range eggs."
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

Now I can talk in the third person.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Wed Jan 17, 2024 8:41 pm

penny
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The Youngs broadsided Honor's career.

But they attacked the wrong side of that broad.
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by penny   » Sat Jan 20, 2024 1:30 am

penny
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Posts: 1181
Joined: Tue Apr 25, 2023 11:55 am

Customs Agent


"He's acting nervous. Call the canine squad."

"Belay that order, call the feline squad."
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The artist formerly known as cthia.

Now I can talk in the third person.
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