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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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Clean Killer absorbs Naval Tactics
After a harrowing battle with many Malign agents. Harahap, "Whew! We were lucky to get out of this one alive." <Nah! I overheard some naval strategy over at the Admiralty. It had something to do with the feet in the tail.> Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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"But you are Clean Killer. Playing around with assholes isn't exactly a clean kill." <No it isn't. But it sure is a good way to get them to expose their juggler. 'Open up wide.' "Say Ah."> " ![]() ![]() " ![]() Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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Pillow talk in the Palace
Right after Honor marries Hamish and Emily "Justin, do you love me enough to share me with someone else?" "I already share you with someone else honey. Ariel rides you more than I do. I don't mind, mind you. It's like dating a married woman. I get all the fun. He gets all the cuddling. He even helps me when your PMS is acting up. I would give my left testicle to keep this arrangement." "What about your right testicle?" "Honey, all men give that one up the moment they say "I do." Diplomatic Incident "I knew I shouldn't have attended that meeting!" "The MA agent requested you." "I was so angry inside, Justin, that I wanted to reach over and pull his heart right out of his throat. Next thing I knew Ariel was handing it to me. What will we do, we can't prosecute Ariel! It was temporary insanity from channeling all of my rage." "The reports say Ariel's tail was flicking so fast it sounded like an old-fashioned helicopter." "I think my rage was a trigger for his. Isn't that how old-fashioned nukes work?" Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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Nimitz' Memoirs
A discussion with the crew "Nimitz, does a Treecat swear?" <We don't use foul language. We use foul images. Instead of telling a cat to go fuck himself, we show him what to do.> " ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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Lenny One's maiden voyage
"Are we going to attack them head on?" "Yes, they are looking for a bow ![]() Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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Alice Truman's Harem
Truman accidentally drops her robe in front of an officer. "HUBBA HUBBA HUBBA! ![]() ... I thought all of your blonde harem used Viagara or Levitra. Now I know it's just SEE ALICE ![]() ![]() Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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The Red Cross
"Where are we headed?" "We received an SOS from a ship in distress? "What are we gonna do?" "We're going to give her a jump." "We're gonna what?" "We're going to give her a transfusion." "What?!!!" "She had a complete reactor scram. She needs plasma." "Huh? ![]() ... "That's a big phucking ship!" "Don't worry. We always carry the bigger needles. The monster cables." Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof. | |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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Math problem
Do forgive me, but everyone should know by now that I simply can not, should not, would not, could not, will not ever shy away from an opportunity at humor. Textev says that Honor is weak at math. Textev also says that Henke and Honor were roommates and Henke helped Honor with her math. ![]() ![]() ![]() Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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Memoirs
Grayson Armsmen are gangs of cockblockers! —Anonymous Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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cthia
Posts: 14951
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Tourville's Memoirs
"Shannon, you have to remember the 'Citizen Commander' address. 'PC' is shorthand for politically correct and People's Commissioner. You have got to remember that with this new regime the two are synonomous and dangerous." "PC is also shorthand for personal computer, and my PC is synonomous with 'blow' and 'up'. Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense |
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