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Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by captainofthelist   » Wed Nov 16, 2011 12:37 am

captainofthelist
Commander

Posts: 220
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2011 10:59 am

Werrf wrote:Posted this a while back, but it fits better here...

First, we must remember that the Star Empire of Manticore's existence is based entirely on the Manticoran Junction. Without the Junction, not only would the older Star Kingdom have been ploughed under by the Havenite forces, but there would never have been any reason for the Kingdom to expand into Basilisk, Trevor's Star or Lynx. Indeed, it would not be too much of a stretch to say that the Star Empire of Manticore should be considered the "Wormhole" empire.

Second, we must remember that much of the Star Empire of Manticore's wealth and power is based on its carrying trade. The Royal Manticoran Navy's very existence is based on that carrying trade, which means that wherever the Merchant Marine goes, the Empire goes with it. It is in fact safe to say that the Star Empire of Manticore "roams" over all known space.

With that in mind, I suggest that the Star Empire of Manticore should be renamed:
The Holey, Roamin' Empire.


Werrf, one more crappy Robin joke like that and I will challenge you to a duel(Ellington Protocol). Will Fly act as my second?
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Wed Nov 16, 2011 9:37 am

pokermind
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 4002
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:58 am
Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

captainofthelist wrote:
Werrf wrote:Posted this a while back, but it fits better here...

First, we must remember that the Star Empire of Manticore's existence is based entirely on the Manticoran Junction. Without the Junction, not only would the older Star Kingdom have been ploughed under by the Havenite forces, but there would never have been any reason for the Kingdom to expand into Basilisk, Trevor's Star or Lynx. Indeed, it would not be too much of a stretch to say that the Star Empire of Manticore should be considered the "Wormhole" empire.

Second, we must remember that much of the Star Empire of Manticore's wealth and power is based on its carrying trade. The Royal Manticoran Navy's very existence is based on that carrying trade, which means that wherever the Merchant Marine goes, the Empire goes with it. It is in fact safe to say that the Star Empire of Manticore "roams" over all known space.

With that in mind, I suggest that the Star Empire of Manticore should be renamed:
The Holey, Roamin' Empire.


Werrf, one more crappy Robin joke like that and I will challenge you to a duel(Ellington Protocol). Will Fly act as my second?


"Might I be so bold Admiral Warrf, sir. To suggest as the challenged party you chose blunderbusses and balloons, an approved form in the last official code duelem published on old Terra's Imperial Germany 1917AD." Admiral Werrf looks puzzled, Chief Poker Mind continues, "No, Sir, the old PD AD. I'll lend you 'the Beast' my inch and a half, half pounder. At twenty five yards she has a lovely six foot pattern to bring Captainofthelist's balloon down fast. We need to rid the Honorverse of this Batmanverse hooligan, Sir. Spacecat First Mangy Fur will hold your coat, and I offer my services as your second, sir."
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Wed Nov 16, 2011 12:06 pm

pokermind
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Posts: 4002
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:58 am
Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

pokermind wrote:
captainofthelist wrote:
Re: Admiral Warrf's "With that in mind, I suggest that the Star Empire of Manticore should be renamed:
The Holey, Roamin' Empire. "

Werrf, one more crappy Robin joke like that and I will challenge you to a duel(Ellington Protocol). Will Fly act as my second?


"Might I be so bold Admiral Warrf, sir. To suggest as the challenged party you chose blunderbusses and balloons, an approved form in the last official code duelem published in old Terra's Imperial Germany 1917AD." Admiral Werrf looks puzzled, Chief Poker Mind continues, "No, Sir, the old PD AD. I'll lend you 'the Beast' my inch and a half, half pounder. At twenty five yards she has a lovely six foot pattern to bring Captainofthelist's balloon down fast. We need to rid the Honorverse of this Batmanverse hooligan, Sir. Spacecat First Mangy Fur will hold your coat, and I offer my services as your second, sir."


To complete the above mind pun think of Jack Gleeson and Art Carney in The Honeymooners when forming a mind imiage of Chief Poker Mind and Mangy Fur, Art's character worked in the sewers akin to Mangy Fur's duties. Do treecats wear pork-pie hats?

PS in the Baseball topic someone suggested racing as a sport in the Honorverse. In another topic I suggested treecat society would split into country and city -cats, and one comedic soul made the mind pun of a country treecat chewing tobacco and having 53 guns, well now OMG we can add Honorverse NASCAR watching. Are minature CATapillier baseball caps far behind?

Down Mind-Pun-Zillia Down
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Thu Nov 17, 2011 9:31 am

pokermind
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 4002
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:58 am
Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

Theswerd wrote:Captain Costello leaned back in his chair as his squadron XO stepped into the office.

"Heeeeeey, Abbott, what do you have for me?"

Well," Cmdr. Abbott took a chair across the desk from his captain nd once again considered how to approach a serious matter with his somewhat... addle-minded, superior. "We have the matter of switching up the patrol schedule again. I thought we could hand some of it off onto the new tincans the admiralty sent our way."

Costello nodded. "Sounds good. What do you have in mind?"

Abbott checked his notes. "Well, the way I worked up the Schedule, I've got Hu's on First patrol, Wat's on second, and Adonahue on Third."

Costello's eye's narrowed... "You've got the schedule worked out?"

"... Yes sir..."

"And it's on your notes?"

"Yes sir."

"Then who's on First Patrol?"

"That's right."

"Who."

"Yes sir."

"The man's name on First Patrol."

"Hu."

"The man on First."

"Hu!"

"The commander of the tin can on First Patrol!"

"Hu's on First Patrol!"

"THAT'S WHAT I WANNA FIND OUT, IS WHAT'S THE GUYS NAME OF FIRST PATROL!"

"No, sir, Wat's on Second patrol!"

"I dunno who!"

"Adonahue is on Third patrol, sir!"

*Theswerd Whistles an innocent tune as he wanders away...*


The Chief's favorite Abbot and Costello take off http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RY7_ZwgoeJM Enjoy.

Although not exactly funny I thought this I found might have been missed by some of you
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9iUO6K6a5jM
Enjoy.
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by Thirdbase   » Thu Nov 17, 2011 6:18 pm

Thirdbase
Admiral

Posts: 2186
Joined: Thu Jun 24, 2010 8:27 pm

pokermind wrote:
Theswerd wrote:Captain Costello leaned back in his chair as his squadron XO stepped into the office.

"Heeeeeey, Abbott, what do you have for me?"

Well," Cmdr. Abbott took a chair across the desk from his captain nd once again considered how to approach a serious matter with his somewhat... addle-minded, superior. "We have the matter of switching up the patrol schedule again. I thought we could hand some of it off onto the new tincans the admiralty sent our way."

Costello nodded. "Sounds good. What do you have in mind?"

Abbott checked his notes. "Well, the way I worked up the Schedule, I've got Hu's on First patrol, Wat's on second, and Adonahue on Third."

Costello's eye's narrowed... "You've got the schedule worked out?"

"... Yes sir..."

"And it's on your notes?"

"Yes sir."

"Then who's on First Patrol?"

"That's right."

"Who."

"Yes sir."

"The man's name on First Patrol."

"Hu."

"The man on First."

"Hu!"

"The commander of the tin can on First Patrol!"

"Hu's on First Patrol!"

"THAT'S WHAT I WANNA FIND OUT, IS WHAT'S THE GUYS NAME OF FIRST PATROL!"

"No, sir, Wat's on Second patrol!"

"I dunno who!"

"Adonahue is on Third patrol, sir!"

*Theswerd Whistles an innocent tune as he wanders away...*


The Chief's favorite Abbot and Costello take off http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RY7_ZwgoeJM Enjoy.

Although not exactly funny I thought this I found might have been missed by some of you
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9iUO6K6a5jM
Enjoy.


I don't know why I use Thirdbase as a handle.
------------
runsforcelery wrote:
Thirdbase wrote:I think that was the next novel.



Allow me to demonstrate my concision, brevity, and economy of phrase:

"Smart alec!" ;p
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Fri Nov 18, 2011 10:53 pm

pokermind
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 4002
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:58 am
Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

A Raising Thunder Joke:

What was the last thought in Admiral Fillerata's mind?

Oh! My God! The Manties were right there are Mesan agents.
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Sat Nov 19, 2011 9:35 am

pokermind
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 4002
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:58 am
Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

pokermind wrote:A Raising Thunder Joke:

What was the last thought in Admiral Fillerata's mind?

Oh! My God! The Manties were right there are Mesan agents.


And from another topic A Raising Thunder pun:

rdt wrote:I was and am surprised that with all the palaver taking place on Earth and the stuff involving the Manticoran Ambassador to the SL and the Beowulf delegation to the SL Assembly, that not one word, not even a peep was heard from the Haven Ambassador. I really think that DW missed the boat on that.


Not a peep from the Haven Ambassador. Two thumbs up from the old Chief on that pun. For our non fluent in American English fans, a peep is the sound a young bird makes, and not a peep means not a word in American Slang, but peep is also the Manti slang for the Havenites, thus the pun.
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Sat Nov 19, 2011 11:37 pm

pokermind
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 4002
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:58 am
Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

The old Chief found some Grayson Classical Music he thinks you'll like http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7MAz9NY44Qc ENJOY Classic Marty Robins song Big Iron with Sci-Fi look.
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by AdmiralStarNight   » Sun Nov 20, 2011 12:22 am

AdmiralStarNight
Lieutenant (Senior Grade)

Posts: 79
Joined: Sun Dec 12, 2010 10:43 pm
Location: RMN Aggressor

One day aboard the ship HMS Trebuchet an Ensign and his Commander were playing cards. Their ship was currently sitting near a hyper-bridge in Solarian League space and the CO of the Astro-control of this end of the bridge had be POed by the Manties presence.

"Sir," The Ensign said, "I have a idea."

The commander looked up, "Go on."

"Well Sir, you know how all Sollies are idiots, right?"

The Commander nodded.

"I plan on finding someone in the Solly Navy, without even leaving this station, that is smart."

The Commander laughed. "Good luck Ensign, How about you give me a day's worth of your pay if you don't find this person." He laughed even more, "If you do happen to find this rare Sollie, I'll give you a month’s worth of my pay."

"Alright Sir." The Ensign and Commander shook hands.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(Aboard the Astro Control Station)
Later that week on the Astro control station the Commander was inspecting a control panel when in walked the Ensign with a uniformed Sollie captain at his heals.

"Hello Ensign, Captain, how may I help you?" The Commander asked.

The Ensign took out a boot and poured some water from his water bottle into it. He gave it to the Sollie who looked oddly at it.

"What is this?" The Sollie asked.

"Look on the heel for instructions." The Ensign offered and the Sollie complied, pouring the water out of the boot.

The Commander's jaw dropped in astonishment.

The Ensign's bank account was richer by the amount of a commander's monthly salary after that.
~~
Lester Tourville♥
"The Solarian League government is selling many technological advancements and weapons to the Havenites.
Yeah, it's part of a new initiative called, 'Operation: Regret This In Seventeen Years.'"
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Sun Nov 20, 2011 1:04 pm

pokermind
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 4002
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:58 am
Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

Namelessfly gave two in his Duckk topic,

"Why do Duckks have flat feet?

To stamp out forest fires.

Why do elephants have flat feet?

To stamp out burning Duckks."

The chief replyed:

"Why do Duckks have Namelessfly swatters?

I hope y'all don't find out, Fly"

There is an ancient Roman saying, "A fly may think he's an eagle, but if the eagle sees him there is an end to the silly creature."

Any other fly jokes out there? Or to be fair Duckk jokes?

A Sea Shanty for ye, Drunken Sailor, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLYLO_T5YFo, Enjoy Arrr-

CPO Poker Mind.

Oops the old Chief messed up the ancient Roman saying it is, "The eagle may not hawk for flies, but if he sees one there is an end to the creature." *&%$#@!! stroke riddled Swiss Cheese brain!
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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