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Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea

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Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by lwhitehead   » Wed Aug 27, 2014 2:39 pm

lwhitehead
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Kavi are what renamed space cat race, the word Kavi means at lest three things, to the Terrans the people, it's also named of the Imperial House and the First Emperor.



Kavi race makeup:

The Kavi a race made up of Four Feline bipeds, a main Imperial Tiger race with Three other sub races an Lionese, Jaguar and Leopard.

each Kavi race have Three fingers and a opposable thumb all with retractable claws, they also walk upright there is no backwards legs. Kavi tails have fur on them the Lionese tial have tuff of hair at the end, Height is undetermed yet between 6ft to 8ft tall it was the Other(to be named at later date) that brought these orginial races together.


Kavi culture:

The Kavi were orginial Iron Age people before the uplift by the Other(to be name at a later date), now there culture is based on Imperial China including there food and drink they are a Wine and Tea race it's the Terrans that introduced Beer. The races are devided between commoner and noble currently there 64 great noble houses including the Imperial one. They have music which includes Opera, and Base 8 math the number Eight plays a big role in Kavi culture. There are Eight days to there week, The Noble Kavi denote there House and rank by there House Belt which is like an Obi.


Kavi First Emperor: Kavi the First Emperor of the Kavi founder of the Kavi Imperial House and fountainhead of the Kavi people and empire, he wrote 60 codex for his people. He is also has divinity due to being the brother of the God of War, Kavi also found original Eight noble houses including his own.

The Third Emperor:

The Third Emperor is known as the expander due to the fact he upped to number of Noble Houses to 32 and inlarged the Empire as well, his pelt was that of a White Tiger. Any Kavi born with a pure White pelt is believed to do great things when ever the social rank of the Kavi is,


The God of War:

The God of War was Tiger Kavi who was the First to fight back against the Other(to be name at a later date), His death was glorious and believed to ascend into the sky has a God of War.


The God of Death: The Grim Hunter

The Kavi God of Death is there oldest god of this race, Picture by Kavi as the ultimate Hunter his figure is that of a faceless hooded cloaked being, The Kavi taught since birth that the Grim Hunter shadows life hence a Kavi's own shadow is God chacing them throught there own life. Dieing is when the Grim Hunter has caught up to his prey, all are prey to the Grim Hunter both common and noble.


Armed and Space Naval forces:

The Kavi armed and Space Naval forces are based on Imperial Japan, Officers are normally came from the Great Houses it's rare that a Commoner gains Officer rank.



LW
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Re: Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by The E   » Wed Aug 27, 2014 3:39 pm

The E
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Okay, you wanted feedback on this, so feedback you're going to get. Be aware that I am not in the habit of pulling punches when it comes to criticizing writing; this will be short, sharp, and to the point. Please keep in mind that this is not an attack on you as a person, it is an assessment of your skills as a writer.

lwhitehead wrote:Kavi are what renamed space cat race, the word Kavi means at lest three things, to the Terrans the people, it's also named of the Imperial House and the First Emperor.


Okay. So, right out of the gate, I have to criticize not the words, but the sentences. Rule one for aspiring writers: Words matter. Grammar matters. Syntax matters. Do not just write things sloppily, as you would an instant message; These words are expressions of your skills and talents, and should be treated with care. Just as painters do not start by slathering the canvas in paint (unless they're Jackson Pollock), so should you take care to arrange your thoughts and concepts into proper sentences and paragraphs.

Kavi race makeup:

The Kavi a race made up of Four Feline bipeds, a main Imperial Tiger race with Three other sub races an Lionese, Jaguar and Leopard.

each Kavi race have Three fingers and a opposable thumb all with retractable claws, they also walk upright there is no backwards legs. Kavi tails have fur on them the Lionese tial have tuff of hair at the end, Height is undetermed yet between 6ft to 8ft tall it was the Other(to be named at later date) that brought these orginial races together.


Okay, so these were uplifted? You said they were "brought together", were these races taken from separate home planets, or did they evolve on the same one? Why are they physiologically identifiably felinoid?


Kavi culture:

The Kavi were orginial Iron Age people before the uplift by the Other(to be name at a later date), now there culture is based on Imperial China including there food and drink they are a Wine and Tea race it's the Terrans that introduced Beer.


How did they evolve a society recognizably chinese? Was this deliberate cultural contamination? How did a race of (presumably) obligate carnivores develop equivalents of confucianism? Taoism? How come they arrived at a model of society that is followed all over their empire? How did a race get united by one creed like that?

The races are devided between commoner and noble currently there 64 great noble houses including the Imperial one. They have music which includes Opera, and Base 8 math the number Eight plays a big role in Kavi culture. There are Eight days to there week, The Noble Kavi denote there House and rank by there House Belt which is like an Obi.


These are quite disconnected factoids. Why are there exactly 64 noble houses? How is that number maintained? How long has this society existed in that state? What makes it stable? They have music, ok, but why is Opera important to them?

Kavi First Emperor: Kavi the First Emperor of the Kavi founder of the Kavi Imperial House and fountainhead of the Kavi people and empire, he wrote 60 codex for his people. He is also has divinity due to being the brother of the God of War, Kavi also found original Eight noble houses including his own.


How did that happen? How long ago was this? What have subsequent rulers done?

The Third Emperor:

The Third Emperor is known as the expander due to the fact he upped to number of Noble Houses to 32 and inlarged the Empire as well, his pelt was that of a White Tiger. Any Kavi born with a pure White pelt is believed to do great things when ever the social rank of the Kavi is,


Enlarged the empire how? Are we talking interstellar, or planetary empire here? What factors caused him to expand his holdings, what difficulties did he face during and after the expansion?


The God of War:

The God of War was Tiger Kavi who was the First to fight back against the Other(to be name at a later date), His death was glorious and believed to ascend into the sky has a God of War.


Why did they fight against their benefactors? How did they win?

The God of Death: The Grim Hunter

The Kavi God of Death is there oldest god of this race, Picture by Kavi as the ultimate Hunter his figure is that of a faceless hooded cloaked being, The Kavi taught since birth that the Grim Hunter shadows life hence a Kavi's own shadow is God chacing them throught there own life. Dieing is when the Grim Hunter has caught up to his prey, all are prey to the Grim Hunter both common and noble.


Okay. Seems appropriate.


Armed and Space Naval forces:

The Kavi armed and Space Naval forces are based on Imperial Japan, Officers are normally came from the Great Houses it's rare that a Commoner gains Officer rank.


What makes these forces Japanese? What specifically is recognizably japanese about them, and how did those elements evolve?


Right then. There are a few questions that you probably should elaborate some more on, but the big question I have is this: What kind of story do you want to tell here? Do you just want to build up a story setting for you to play in? Or do you have just one story planned for this? Will the protagonists be cat people, or humans?
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Re: Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by lwhitehead   » Wed Aug 27, 2014 8:10 pm

lwhitehead
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First off this will be from Kavi point of view this book series one Kavi Tiger who has pure White pelt that of the Third Emperor, he will do great things.

I've bin playing Startrek online Klingon race lately, it's bin given me ideas.


The Number Eight in Kavi culture:

Since the Kavi use base Eight Math, this due to having Four fingers on each hand and foot. The current noble houses number is 64 at the start of the series, 8x4=32 there are 4 types of Kavi so 64 divided by 4 = 16 that's how many nobles houses added to each type of Kavi.

Kavi Uplift: The Other(who will named and thought out later), found the Kavi 26,000 years ago if I counting right in space history the Tigers were an Iron Age race while the Three others were sub species an Bronze Age ones. The Other(who will be name and thought out later)had a small intersteller empire and was looking for a perfect slave race, Since the Tigers were approached First they still consider themselves the true Imperial race. For 1,000 years the Kavi were used by the Others(who will be named and thought at a later date) as fighters in there wars and pits, too labor in fields and building there cities.


25,000 The Kavi Revolt:

The Kavi revolt started by eight founders of the original Eight Noble Houses including Kavi brother of the God of War, they warred on the Other(who will be named and thought of at later date). This was a war of the Kavi people for there freedom killing there hated Masters and take over there intersteller Empire divided into Eight parts each seen over by a Great House the Imperial House got there middle section the homeworld as there part.

The Kavi Great Houses:

the 64 Great Kavi Houses each rule over section of the Kavi intersteller Empire for the Imperial Family, each House has there own armed retainers and fighting space ships which become part of the Imperial Space Navy during War. Not every commoner are House retainers,

Kavi Commoners:

Not all Common Kavi are Great House retainers most of them are farmers, craftmen or merchants, they live in villages or towns. House retainers wear a sash from top Right shoulder to left side of waist in House coat of arms.

Kavi Food and Drink:

the Kavi dishes are based on Chinese Food as well know it, this is due many to the Others(who will be named and thought of at a later date). They forced the Kavi to grow and eat crops they were strange to them, this includes wild type of Rice. Wine and Tea were developed before the Others came to them,



Kavi Culture:


The Kavi Emperor rules with the Mandate of the God of War, and since the Kavi Imperila House claim strongest bloodline of the War God there Mandate is to be the Father or Mother of there people, all flow to and from the Imperial throne with a Imperial council made up of the other 63 Great Houses to run the day to day affairs of the Empire they advise the throne on important matters.
The Third emperor create the council to speak for the Commoners to the Imperial Throne, also he created the council so to keep an eye on other Great Houses from gaining to much power.




LW
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Re: Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by The E   » Wed Aug 27, 2014 11:45 pm

The E
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How did this empire stay stable over a period of time longer than recorded human history?

How did the Others (and we get it, you haven't created them yet, no need to keep repeating that) get the low-down on Chinese cuisine before the Chinese invented it? Rice, after all, was only domesticated somewhere between 8 and 13 thousand years ago; if the kitties threw of their shackles 25000 years ago, that doesn't quite fit.
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Re: Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by lwhitehead   » Thu Aug 28, 2014 6:10 pm

lwhitehead
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First the timeline is flexable Kavi race and interspace empire, on the subject of Chinese food, I was using it as a model and who can says that Chinese style food could be developed on different world.


LW
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Re: Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by The E   » Fri Aug 29, 2014 6:16 am

The E
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lwhitehead wrote:First the timeline is flexable Kavi race and interspace empire, on the subject of Chinese food, I was using it as a model and who can says that Chinese style food could be developed on different world.


The reason I'm asking these questions is to get details about this background that aren't apparent from your postings, but are somewhat crucial in terms of how this species of yours acts and reacts to outside forces. It's all very well to say "this empire has been around for 25000 years", but given that there is not a single institution or culture on this planet which can claim perfect institutional continuity for even a tenth of that time (Never mind ideological continuity), that implies a vastly different outlook on society and the world in general than what we are accustomed to.

On another level, going back to my first post in this thread, remember what I said about organizing your thoughts and concepts into coherent sentences?
This:
First the timeline is flexable Kavi race and interspace empire,


isn't a coherent sentence in the english language. It doesn't make sense, it is almost unparseable. "The timeline is flexible", okay, that I understand, "Kavi race and interstellar empire" as an addition to that first statement is incomprehensible. What relation does that fragment have with the first part of the statement?
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Re: Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by Michael Everett   » Fri Aug 29, 2014 1:00 pm

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Part of writing is doing lots of thinking about the hows, why and wherefores of your story universe. Before starting my original story Technoss Unchained (sci-fi with the main character being a humanoid cat-person), I wrote several pages of A4 sketching out the basic technologies, starship types, general culture, historical overview and notes on interspecies relations as seen here.

Due to my writing style and the fact that I tend towards stories of less depth than others (such as RFC), I only needed 4 or 5 pages of foundations in order to build my story from. For larger stories, you need far more, including but not limited to sketched maps, cultural development notes, superstitions, historical references (both real-life and in-universe). The bigger the story, the bigger the skeleton it hangs on needs to be, otherwise you end up either writing yourself into a corner (and having to do a deux ex machina to escape) or you end up with plot-holes you could pilot Dahak through.

I still get questioned over something I forgot about in my Naruto fanfic story Invisible Fox. I turned a knife invisible in the prologue and failed to use it at all in the rest of the story.
:oops: Ooops.

A good resource basis is TVTropes, although it is best to treat it as a multi-media index/map, leading you to works of other authors who have come across similar issues in their stories.
For a starting point, you may want to check out the TVTropes pages Cat Folk and Beast Man, checking out some of the works referenced in those pages may help you smooth out the societal structure and history of the Kavi.

Oh, and I have cat-people in all four of my currently-published original stories.
;) Read them here. :)

Remember, it's the limits that define the story and give the hero something to do.

Good luck!
~~~~~~

I can't write anywhere near as well as Weber
But I try nonetheless, And even do my own artwork.

(Now on Twitter)and mentioned by RFC!
Animal Crossing Dreams at 6E00-00F5-2891
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Re: Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by Thucydides   » Fri Aug 29, 2014 5:33 pm

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So what does having the main characters being cats add to the story? Sad to say, but unless you have a compelling in story reason to do this you have essentially a cast of characters wearing animal suits.

For that matter, why should an alien race resemble anything that lives (or had lived) on Earth? Considering the range of creatures that exist on Earth, form insects to elephants, octopi to orchids, thinking of a really alien species will be quite challenging.
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Re: Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by lwhitehead   » Fri Aug 29, 2014 10:14 pm

lwhitehead
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The Kavi race aren't Humans in a Cat suit, they are a uplifted race.


Some of you have suggested that I've haven't wrote much down on them, well I did I just haven't answer you people wanted.

I still trying to find some stuff like there timeline, I also still have to figure FTL of both the Humans and Kavi ships, also what do the ships look like.

LW
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Re: Kavi 27th century setting rexmix idea
Post by Thucydides   » Fri Aug 29, 2014 11:41 pm

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lwhitehead wrote:The Kavi race aren't Humans in a Cat suit, they are a uplifted race.

Some of you have suggested that I've haven't wrote much down on them, well I did I just haven't answer you people wanted.

I still trying to find some stuff like there timeline, I also still have to figure FTL of both the Humans and Kavi ships, also what do the ships look like.

LW


Saying they are an uplifted race is sort of begging the question. If their motivations are essentially human, then having them described as felines is putting them in animal suits. Is there some characteristic of the big cats that is critical to the story you want to tell?

Judging from the rest of your reply, you are creating a stage set without actually writing a story. The way the ships look isn't going to be very important unless you are writing something like "Master and Commander", where the HMS Surprise is one of the characters. Similarly the timeline and method of FTL may or may not be important, depending on the sort of story you are thinking of.

A classic example is when Jerry Pournelle was laying the groundwork for his CoDominium series of stories, the fact that in universe FTL was point to point was important because it made space navies analogous to "wet" navies, needing to control particular areas of space the way capes and straights are important to sea traffic and sea control on Earth. This was a deliberate choice because Pournelle was writing about a society that was becoming corrupt and moving from a Republic towards an Empire, so how the military forces worked was very important to the story arc. (A free wheeling "Star Trek" type of FTL would essentially make Empires impossible, since anyone could just pop in over your planet, and space navies would be only minimally effective in defending you).

So, what sort of story are you trying to tell? Is having the characteristics of big cats important to the story? Is the timeline, method of FTL or the look of the ships critical to how the story unfolds?

To help answer some of those questions, look at your assumptions. You mentioned this Empire is very ancient, so the question was raised about how it remains stable over such a long period of time. The question of who did the uplifting and why might be looked at again, would the race that did the uplifting not have a more cost effective way of creating warriors from their own resources (battle robots, or just saturating enemy planets with nukes?) Is there some other motivation that impels them to go around the galaxy looking for races to uplift?

There are a lot of things to look at, and questions for you, as the author, to answer. Doing this work can only help you in the long run to make your stories more interesting and attract more readers to your work.
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