Topic Actions

Topic Search

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests

Self proclaimed one-liners

For anyone who might want to have a side conversation...you're welcome here!
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by cthia   » Sat Mar 17, 2018 6:29 am

cthia
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 10686
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:10 pm

The misinformed and easily influenced, will be misinformed and easily influenced.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
Top
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by cthia   » Thu Mar 22, 2018 1:19 am

cthia
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 10686
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:10 pm

When we strive to become gods, we fail miserably at being men, and fail hopelessly at being gods.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
Top
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by Imaginos1892   » Sat Mar 24, 2018 9:51 am

Imaginos1892
Rear Admiral

Posts: 1082
Joined: Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:24 pm
Location: San Diego, California, USA

At the bottom of all those warning signs that tell people not to do incredibly stupid things, there should be a final notice:

IF YOU ARE STUPID ENOUGH TO DO THAT AFTER READING THIS WARNING, YOU DESERVE TO DIE.
Top
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by Imaginos1892   » Thu Apr 05, 2018 12:53 am

Imaginos1892
Rear Admiral

Posts: 1082
Joined: Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:24 pm
Location: San Diego, California, USA

From my ongoing VanDread story:

Barnette wrote:Maybe I can't help you, but I'm not going to live with knowing I didn't even try.
Top
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by Imaginos1892   » Mon Apr 23, 2018 10:26 pm

Imaginos1892
Rear Admiral

Posts: 1082
Joined: Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:24 pm
Location: San Diego, California, USA

No matter what you write, some jackass will find a way to take offense, and try to blame it on you. I refuse to take any blame for offended jackasses.
Top
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by The E   » Thu Apr 26, 2018 2:36 am

The E
Admiral

Posts: 2035
Joined: Tue May 07, 2013 12:28 pm
Location: Bielefeld, Germany

Imaginos1892 wrote:No matter what you write, some jackass will find a way to take offense, and try to blame it on you. I refuse to take any blame for offended jackasses.


I thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for this post. Circumstances have conspired to make it, its content, and its placement in this thread to be the most hilarious thing I've seen in a looooooong time. (To be clear: This is not meant as a veiled insult or criticism of you, Imaginos. At some point in the future, I will explain this properly, I promise)
Top
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by Imaginos1892   » Tue May 01, 2018 7:24 pm

Imaginos1892
Rear Admiral

Posts: 1082
Joined: Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:24 pm
Location: San Diego, California, USA

Does Sturgeon's Law apply to the audience, too?
Top
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by Imaginos1892   » Wed May 16, 2018 9:35 pm

Imaginos1892
Rear Admiral

Posts: 1082
Joined: Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:24 pm
Location: San Diego, California, USA

If you can't find something, buy a new one. The old one will turn up in no time.

If you keep something for ten years just in case you need it, you won't.

When you finally get rid of it, you'll need it a week later.
Top
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by Imaginos1892   » Tue Jun 12, 2018 6:41 pm

Imaginos1892
Rear Admiral

Posts: 1082
Joined: Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:24 pm
Location: San Diego, California, USA

If I take enough screws out of the damn thing, it has to come apart, right?

There is always one more damn screw.
Top
Re: Self proclaimed one-liners
Post by Imaginos1892   » Sun Jun 24, 2018 9:17 pm

Imaginos1892
Rear Admiral

Posts: 1082
Joined: Sat Mar 24, 2012 2:24 pm
Location: San Diego, California, USA

Please stop agreeing with me. You're making me look bad.

Something I'm sure a number of us wanted to say to the late Nimitz...
Top

Return to Free-Range Topics...