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Cupid

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Cupid
Post by cthia   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:07 am

cthia
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 11274
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:10 pm

Cupid Motto:
If you wanna fall in love untie your shoes and enjoy the trip.

Please don't tell my sister about this.

"You are always playing matchmaker!," says me sister.

"Well it's obvious that Cupid's on vacation sis."

You are on the schedule to work next shift.

Draw Back Your Bow & Let Your Arrow Flow.


Thomas Theisman ----> Shannon Foraker.


Cupid Creed:
First comes love then comes marriage then comes baby in a baby carriage.

Cupid Manual:
• Do not remove safety caps from arrows until last moment of intended use.

• In case of accidental piercing of skin, antidote must be administered within three seconds. Drink contents of vial around neck and chant...


Witch's Incantation
Fillet of a fenny snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt, and toe of frog,
Wool of bat, and tongue of dog,
Adder’s fork, and blind-worm’s sting,
Lizard’s leg, and howlet’s wing,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.

Strategy:
Hold fire until couples can see the white of their eyes. Ensure reservoir at arrow's tip is filled with juice. Handle lightly to avoid triggering mechanism. Always shoot female first with enough force to penetrate. Females often prove to be fickle.

Tactics:
Stand down wind to avoid stink of unsavory unions.
In cases of unlikely crossed paths, use crossbow.

Caveats:
• Remember to leave key to chastity belt.

• Avoid use of skeleton keys.

• Skeleton keys result in divorce.

• Beware of train when crossing lovers from different sides of track.

• Never fall in love with charges.

• Wingmen, avoid jet wash.

Pamphlet:
'Hysteria' and the Long, Strange History of the Vibrator
In the late 19th century, Victorian-era women who experienced everything from the loss of sexual appetite to neurasthenia—fatigue, anxiety, mild depression—were diagnosed with “female hysteria,” and often prescribed a manual “pelvic massage” meant to cause “hysterical paroxysm” in the patient (translation: orgasm) to cure said maladies...tells the story of the vibrator’s invention.

The funny thing is that the vibrator was kind of invented for a guy as a laborsaving device.”

The usage of “pelvic massage” to combat “female hysteria,” a diagnosis largely debunked in the early 20th century and no longer recognized today, dates all the way back to Hippocrates in 450 B.C., according to Dr. Rachel Maines, a famed sex historian and author of the seminal 1999 book The Technology of Orgasm. It persisted through the Middle Ages but really seemed to explode during the last quarter of the 19th century, when doctors believed there was an epidemic of hysteria. Dr. Russell Trall, a hydrotherapist in the United States, believed that up to 75 percent of women suffered from “female hysteria,” despite having no way of measuring this statistic.

While “hydriatic massage,” achieving paroxysm through spraying water, was used as early as the mid-1700s in U.S. and U.K. bathhouses, manual “pelvic massage” became an enormously popular medical procedure to combat female hysteria during the Victorian era.

And achieving “hysterical paroxysm” in female patients was a very time-consuming task, with doctors of the era claiming it was incredibly difficult to learn and would take up to an hour manually.

While the electromechanical vibrator was invented by Dr. Joseph Mortimer Granville in sometime in the late 1800s, a steam-powered vibrator, called “The Manipulator,” was invented in 1869 by American physician George Taylor. According to Dr. Maines, the patient-interface component was about the size of a dining room table, and had a cutout area for a vibrating sphere. And the steam engine that powered the reciprocating motion of the sphere was located in a separate room from the patient.

“Doctors didn’t like it because you couldn’t move it and take it with you on a house call, and they also didn’t enjoy shoveling coal into it,” says Dr. Maines, with a laugh.

Dr. Granville’s electromechanical vibrator was portable but had a wet cell battery that weighed about 40 pounds, in addition to the vibrator itself and the Vibratodes. Still, these early vibrators reduced the time it took to achieve “paroxysm” in female patients from an hour to around five minutes.

Battery-powered vibrators were introduced as a household appliance as early as 1899, according to Dr. Maines, but doctors were still trying to convince patients it was worth $2-$3 a visit to be treated by gigantic “pelvic massage” machines, including The Chattanooga, a massage contraption on wheels that stood about 5 feet tall.

“After a while, patients realized that if they could order one from Sears for $5, why should the go to the doctor for $2 to $3 a visit?” she says.

The vibrator was enormously popular, and became the fifth electrical appliance to be introduced into the home, alongside the teakettle, sewing machine, fan, and toaster, and ads for the device ran in everything from Needlecraft and Sears, Roebuck and Co.

Men: Do not confuse PMS with Hysteria. PMS is the result of Red Dollar Days. Hysteria is the result of failing to observe Red Dollar Days. Hysteria is real, famous women sing about it...
http://youtu.be/kxMzhhYPD8A

HAPPY HUNTING

Footnotes:
-Hysteria lesson taken from website.
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2 ... tical.html
-Origin of Incantation: the Three Witches in Shakespeare's Macbeth, 1605


Sister Thread: Power Cupid Question Hour
viewtopic.php?f=1&t=6181

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Last edited by cthia on Wed Dec 31, 2014 7:02 am, edited 16 times in total.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Cupid
Post by roseandheather   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:08 am

roseandheather
Admiral

Posts: 2047
Joined: Sun Dec 08, 2013 9:39 pm
Location: United Kingdom

cthia wrote:Please don't tell my sister about this.
Pleaaaaaaase.

"You are always playing matchmaker!," says me sister.

"Well it's obvious that Cupid's on vacation sis."

You are on the schedule to work next shift.

Draw Back Your Bow & Let Your Arrow Flow.


Thomas Theisman ----> Shannon Foraker.



But.... but...... Sonja Hemphill ----> Shannon Foraker!
~*~


I serve at the pleasure of President Pritchart.

Javier & Eloise
"You'll remember me when the west wind moves upon the fields of barley..."
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Re: Cupid
Post by cthia   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:14 am

cthia
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 11274
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:10 pm

roseandheather wrote:
cthia wrote:Please don't tell my sister about this.
Pleaaaaaaase.

"You are always playing matchmaker!," says me sister.

"Well it's obvious that Cupid's on vacation sis."

You are on the schedule to work next shift.

Draw Back Your Bow & Let Your Arrow Flow.


Thomas Theisman ----> Shannon Foraker.



But.... but...... Sonja Hemphill ----> Shannon Foraker!


But you have to get bloodtests before marriage.
Their bloodtest would recommend against it.

Result of that union...
An extra large headed male whom grows up to become The Brain.

Terrorizes universe with a little Pink sidekick!

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Last edited by cthia on Wed Feb 26, 2014 8:43 am, edited 3 times in total.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Cupid
Post by roseandheather   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:16 am

roseandheather
Admiral

Posts: 2047
Joined: Sun Dec 08, 2013 9:39 pm
Location: United Kingdom

cthia wrote:
roseandheather wrote:

But.... but...... Sonja Hemphill ----> Shannon Foraker!


But you have to get bloodtests before marriage.
Their bloostest would recommend against it.

Result of that union...
An extra large headed male whom grows up to become The Brain.
Terrorizes universe with a little Pink sidekick!


Wrong. Result of their union: singularity of lesbian technological nerd love. It will destroy the universe. In a beautiful, beautiful way, of course.
~*~


I serve at the pleasure of President Pritchart.

Javier & Eloise
"You'll remember me when the west wind moves upon the fields of barley..."
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Re: Cupid
Post by cthia   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:17 am

cthia
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 11274
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:10 pm

Gwen Archer ---> Helga Boltitz.

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Last edited by cthia on Wed Feb 12, 2014 12:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Cupid
Post by cthia   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:20 am

cthia
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 11274
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:10 pm

roseandheather wrote:

But.... but...... Sonja Hemphill ----> Shannon Foraker!


Wrong. Result of their union: singularity of lesbian technological nerd love. It will destroy the universe. In a beautiful, beautiful way, of course.[/quote]

:lol: Optimist?!

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Cupid
Post by roseandheather   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:24 am

roseandheather
Admiral

Posts: 2047
Joined: Sun Dec 08, 2013 9:39 pm
Location: United Kingdom

I probably won't reveal my deepest, truest hopes for romance in the upcoming books, but why not - I'll throw out a few I'm not too invested in.

Michael Oversteegen ----> Michelle Henke

Lester Tourville ----> Andrea Jaruwalski

Jacob Zavala ----> Naomi Kaplan

Oliver Diamato ----> Molly DeLaney

Tom Caparelli ----> Patricia Givens

Augustus Khumalo ----> Sonja Hemphill

(Do note that any and all characters named above might also be part of a pairing I desperately want to happen.)
~*~


I serve at the pleasure of President Pritchart.

Javier & Eloise
"You'll remember me when the west wind moves upon the fields of barley..."
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Re: Cupid
Post by cthia   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:37 am

cthia
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 11274
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:10 pm

roseandheather wrote:I probably won't reveal my deepest, truest hopes for romance in the upcoming books, but why not - I'll throw out a few I'm not too invested in.

Michael Oversteegen ----> Michelle Henke

Lester Tourville ----> Andrea Jaruwalski

Jacob Zavala ----> Naomi Kaplan

Oliver Diamato ----> Molly DeLaney

Tom Caparelli ----> Patricia Givens

Augustus Khumalo ----> Sonja Hemphill

(Do note that any and all characters named above might also be part of a pairing I desperately want to happen.)


Oh my, Cupid...you've been a busy little bee.
Woman thou art loosed!

Question. Are not Oversteegen and Henke related?

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Last edited by cthia on Sun Mar 23, 2014 6:11 am, edited 2 times in total.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Cupid
Post by cthia   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:41 am

cthia
Fleet Admiral

Posts: 11274
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 12:10 pm

roseandheather wrote:I probably won't reveal my deepest, truest hopes for romance in the upcoming books, but why not - I'll throw out a few I'm not too invested in.

Michael Oversteegen ----> Michelle Henke

Lester Tourville ----> Andrea Jaruwalski

Jacob Zavala ----> Naomi Kaplan

Oliver Diamato ----> Molly DeLaney

Tom Caparelli ----> Patricia Givens

Augustus Khumalo ----> Sonja Hemphill

(Do note that any and all characters named above might also be part of a pairing I desperately want to happen.)


Won't reveal?
So you were simply a tease all along?!

So as not to break any social promises, can we at least play charades and you let it slip that way? :lol:

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
Top
Re: Cupid
Post by roseandheather   » Mon Feb 03, 2014 3:44 am

roseandheather
Admiral

Posts: 2047
Joined: Sun Dec 08, 2013 9:39 pm
Location: United Kingdom

cthia wrote:
roseandheather wrote:I probably won't reveal my deepest, truest hopes for romance in the upcoming books, but why not - I'll throw out a few I'm not too invested in.

Michael Oversteegen ----> Michelle Henke

Lester Tourville ----> Andrea Jaruwalski

Jacob Zavala ----> Naomi Kaplan

Oliver Diamato ----> Molly DeLaney

Tom Caparelli ----> Patricia Givens

Augustus Khumalo ----> Sonja Hemphill

(Do note that any and all characters named above might also be part of a pairing I desperately want to happen.)


My Cupid...you've been a busy little bee.
Woman thou art loosed!

Question. Are not Oversteegen and Henke related?



I'm a girl. Of course I've been a busy little bee figuring out who would go well with whom. :D

They are, but in a "we're fourth cousins" sort of way. Michael's probably a descendant of a younger Winton sibling some three or four generations back.

(I admit, it's more a random pairing than anything else, but I would be very entertained if Augustus and Sonja ended up together. My, but that would be an interesting relationship... :lol:)

cthia wrote:Won't reveal?
So you were simply a tease all along?!

So as not to break any social promises, can we at least play charades and you let it slip that way? :lol:


Well, if you want to play that guessing game, feel free! Once I've got that pesky thing called sleep out of the way, I'll tell you how wrong you are. ;) :D (Frankly, one of them is blatantly obvious from all the posts I've made, but only if you know exactly what you're looking for.)
~*~


I serve at the pleasure of President Pritchart.

Javier & Eloise
"You'll remember me when the west wind moves upon the fields of barley..."
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