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Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by Daryl   » Sun Feb 08, 2015 6:52 am

Daryl
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Posts: 3503
Joined: Sat Apr 24, 2010 1:57 am
Location: Queensland Australia

The story goes that during the Napoleonic wars a British officer was asked by a French officer Why do you wear Red Coats?". The reply was "So that if we are wounded the soldiers won't notice the blood and be downhearted".
After that all French officers wore brown pants


fallsfromtrees wrote:
cthia wrote:The MAlign Bolthole is found. Everyone wants to be in on the kill. The women are assembling to do just that.

Foraker, Hemphill, Truman, Honor, Henke, Hearns, Palane, etc. All the women are riding shotgun on this one!

Meanwhile, history repeats itself, on a planet far far away, when those females come a-hypering in.

Listen my children and you shall hear
Of the midnite ride of Paul Revere
...
Yeah, they won't be wearing Red Coats until after they have dealt with the MAlign.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by George J. Smith   » Sun Feb 08, 2015 1:32 pm

George J. Smith
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Joined: Tue Feb 19, 2013 7:48 am
Location: Ross-on-Wye UK

[quote="Daryl"]The story goes that during the Napoleonic wars a British officer was asked by a French officer Why do you wear Red Coats?". The reply was "So that if we are wounded the soldiers won't notice the blood and be downhearted".
After that all French officers wore brown pants


[ Daryl,

That one came over on the arc :lol:
.
T&R
GJS

A man should live forever, or die in the attempt
Spider Robinson Callahan's Crosstime Saloon (1977) A voice is heard in Ramah
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sun Feb 08, 2015 4:47 pm

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

George J. Smith wrote:
Daryl wrote:The story goes that during the Napoleonic wars a British officer was asked by a French officer Why do you wear Red Coats?". The reply was "So that if we are wounded the soldiers won't notice the blood and be downhearted".
After that all French officers wore brown pants


[ Daryl,

That one came over on the arc :lol:

:lol: I just now got that one too. It sailed loooooooooooooong. Very funny! :lol:


****** *

There are Bébé's Kids everywhere. Bébé has them and then dumps them off wherever she goes to get them out of her hair. Sooner or later they end up at Protector's Palace - these overly rambunctious spawns of Satan and Bébé. How do the treecats deal with these maniacal mischievous miscreants of Mayhew mayhem?

"NO FAIR! WHY DO TREECATS ALWAYS GET TO PLAY DOCTOR AND WE HAVE TO BE THE PATIENT!"

Ears flatten, teeth bare in unison, and all the treecats raise one pinky finger with unsheathed claw, grinning and slobbering...

<Because, my little pilgrim. We have all the scalpels!>

" :o MOM! I wanna go home. NOW!"

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by saber964   » Tue Feb 10, 2015 10:14 pm

saber964
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Location: Spokane WA USA

George J. Smith wrote:
Daryl wrote:The story goes that during the Napoleonic wars a British officer was asked by a French officer Why do you wear Red Coats?". The reply was "So that if we are wounded the soldiers won't notice the blood and be downhearted".
After that all French officers wore brown pants


[ Daryl,

That one came over on the arc :lol:



Try that with the Royal Green Jackets during the AWI, they took so many casualties that the regimental commander ordered the troops to don forest green coats in order to prevent them from being such easy targets.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Wed Feb 11, 2015 9:48 pm

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

What do you get if you cross a Mesan and a treecat on the roof?

SOS ............................................................. Shit on a Shingle.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Thu Feb 12, 2015 7:35 am

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

What do you get if a treecat crosses his claws with your anal cavity?

Him-aroars.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Fri Feb 13, 2015 11:32 am

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

Pavel Young's troubles began with curiosity about what's under Honor's clothing.

Proof positive that curiosity kills the cat and the rat.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Sun Feb 15, 2015 10:48 am

pokermind
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Posts: 4002
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:58 am
Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

Mange, <An old wet Navy Chief finally retired and got that chicken ranch he always wanted. He took with him his life-long pet parrot.

<First morning at 0430, the parrot squawked loudly and
said, “Reveille, Reveille. Up all hands. Heave out and trice up. The smoking lamp is lighted, now Reveille.”
The old chief told the parrot, “We are no longer in the
Navy. Go back to sleep.”

<The next morning, the parrot did the same thing. Chief
told the parrot, “If you keep this up, I'll put you out in the
chicken pen.”

<Again the parrot did it, and true to his word, the Chief put the parrot in the chicken pen.

<About 0630 the next morning, the Chief was awakened
by one heck of a ruckus in the chicken pen. He went out
to see what was the matter. The parrot had about 40
white chickens at attention in formation, and on the
ground laid 3 bruised and beaten brown chickens. The
parrot was saying, “By God, when I say fall out in dress
whites, I don't mean Khakis!” :D >

Chief, "No chicken ranch for me I'm looking for the proverbial blind deaf, and dumb heiris to a whiskey distillery."

Mange & Poker
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by pokermind   » Thu Feb 19, 2015 1:33 pm

pokermind
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Posts: 4002
Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:58 am
Location: Jerome, Idaho, USA

Mange:

A man is driving by a farm when he sees a sign that says “Talking Dog for Sale.” He drives by the farm thinking nothing of it. Then he turns around a decides to go back. The man drives up to the farm and goes up to the door and knocks on it. The farmer answers the door. The man says “Is that true? Do you have a talking dog for sale?” The farmer says “Yes, I do. He’s out back. Would you like to see him?”
The man says “Yes, I would.” The farmer takes the man out back to see the dog and says “You can talk to him.” The man says to the dog “Can you talk?”
“Yes, I can,” the dog replied. “I used to work for the CIA. They used to send me to China, East Germany, and the Soviet Union. I used sit underneath the desks of the leaders of those countries and I’d listen to what they were saying and report back to my handlers and tell them what they said. The leaders of those countries didn’t suspect me. I did this for five years then I retired. I had a wife and puppies. When they grew up and had families of their own, the wife and I came to live here. The wife died and I’ve been alone for the
past ten years. I had a very good life and I’m enjoying my
retirement.” The man looks at the farmer and says “Is that right?”
The man said. “You have a goldmine here. If he can talk, why are you selling him?”
The farmer replied. “It’s mostly all true. Of course we always had to disregard everything he said.”
The man asked. “Why is that?”
“Because he’s such a liar,” the farmer replied.


Chief, "What the f--- does that have to do with the Honorverse?"

<Nothing, I was thinking of changine the dog to a treecat but, you can't own or sell a treecat can you?>

Poker & Mange
CPO Poker Mind Image and, Mangy Fur the Smart Alick Spacecat.

"Better to be hung for a hexapuma than a housecat," Com. Pang Yau-pau, ART.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sat Feb 21, 2015 9:31 am

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

Just in on ticker tape.

Cordelia Ransom, after being turned away and laughed at at the Pearly Gates was sent to Hell.

It seems she has carried out a successful coup. She told the Devil "Get the Hell outta here! I'm more qualified for this job than you! I've been a devil all my life. You were an angel half of yours!!!"

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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