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Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.

Join us in talking discussing all things Honor, including (but not limited to) tactics, favorite characters, and book discussions.
Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Mon Sep 03, 2018 8:24 am

cthia
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Hegemon wrote:
cthia wrote:Hegemon, I really really enjoyed this, but admittedly I didn't catch the reference to George Orwell's 1984, though I recall doing a book report on it in Junior High, but that was many many eons ago. What was it?


Well, the reference to George Orwell's 1984 was "we were always allies with Eastasia, ahem, I mean Manticore"

You see, in 1984 there are three rival totalitarian states that control the Earth: Oceania (to which narrator belongs to), Eurasia and Eastasia. Eurasia and Eastasia seem to be continuously at war with each other and Oceania periodically but constantly changes sides, being allied with Eastasia and at war with Eurasia, and then the reverse, then again allied with Eastasia and so on.

However, given that their state workers must practice 'doublethink' (I tend to think of it as something akin to auto-hypnosis) on the pain of torture and death, Oceania's Propaganda Ministry (fittingly named the Ministry of Truth) can persuade everybody but the heretic 'oldthinkers' that the current state of alliances was forever and Oceania's alliances never shifted.

Now, the parallel I was trying to draw was that President Pritchart should understand that for military reasons alone the Republic's relations with Manticore must shift from war to that of good neighbors, or, better still, allies. Once that goal was set, it would be advisable to start a pro-Manticore and pro-Alliance PR campaign now, rather than hoping your own citizens are mindless drones that would accept the sudden announcement of normal or friendly relations with the Alliance without battling an eyelid (and that, like in 1984, they would forget they fought two wars against the Alliance and were taught to hate Manticore).


Thanks, Hegemon. No way was my book report as intense or in-depth, but then that was 7th grade, where we also had to cover Animal Farm - many prolongless years ago. At any rate, I didn't catch the reference, or remember it.

Thanks again.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by Hegemon   » Mon Sep 03, 2018 3:49 pm

Hegemon
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Hello. This is the last installment for a while of President Pritchart's Daily Journal. I think the next Daily Journal will be that of Emperor Gustav Anderman XI or maybe that of Baron High Ridge

President Pritchart's Daily Journal, 12 October 1921:
- After Operation Thunderbolt, some politician from a former PRH system that voted to be independent suggested that his system and others like it had more valid casus belli against us as the successor state to PRH (the massive civil rights violations, the economic exploitation, the absence of reparations from the Republic, etc.) than the one we used for breaking the truce with Manticore (publicly lying about some diplomatic correspondence). What a rude thing to say! It makes me wonder why I allowed them to secede in the first place!
- Before Operation Thunderbolt, some Manticoran politician had the gall to say the following: "The PRH conquered and occupied 21 of the 27 disputed systems for 20 to 40 years (and many more, besides) without asking their people's permission, then attacked and tried to conquer Manticore but were defeated. Now the restored Republic is urgently demanding to give them back all of the 21 populated systems we took in self-defense. They forget that none of the 21 populated systems would end up having any loyalty for their Republic (in a large-scale Stockholm Syndrome) without being illegally conquered by it in the first place. In quite a number of places, that lingering loyalty to the Republic is the result of PRH's activities that can be described as "population cleansing": killing and deporting millions of their natives to places like Haven and bringing in loyal dolists from the Haven System. Therefore, the Golden Rule dictates that Manticore, as the victim, should be allowed to have them under its protectorate for a period of time equal with that of PRH's illegal occupation of that system (20-40 years, depending on the system) and organize a referendum deciding the future of each of them at the end of the corresponding period, in order to allow that Stockholm Syndrome to wear off. In that scenario, I doubt that the option to rejoin the Republic would receive 10% of the votes in any referendum, when they are eventually held."* That argument made no sense whatsoever!
- The same Manticoran politician said that our demands for urgent referenda in the disputed systems would be like Germany immediately after World War II asking for a new Sudetenland referendum about its reunion with Germany! For the life of me, I cannot see the parallels!
- Javier is still dead.
- The Battle of Manticore is still lost.
- Two million spacers are still dead.
- The war is still not won.


* That would have been in my opinion the just resolution of the dispute. The new Republic is the self-acknowledged successor state to PRH, and as such it does not get to claim a group of victim systems suffering from a form of Stockholm Syndrome that were liberated in self-defense by another intended victim (Manticore) that just happened to be more than the PRH could chew. I came to this conclusion because my familiarity with German and Russian expansionism and assimilation methods made me see the obvious parallels with the PRH's pre-1905 occupation policies of its conquered systems and made me have very little sympathy for Pritchart administration's demands for those systems to be swiftly returned.
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Thu Sep 06, 2018 2:45 pm

cthia
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Tsang's Debriefing


"WTF! . . . WTF! . . .W T F! . . .

Did you hear what happened? I'll tell you what happened.


The Goddam SOBs denied us translation! . . .

THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED!

WHAT THE FUCK!"

"Calm down Tsang. We warned you that might happen."

"I DON'T RECALL YOU MAKING IT CLEAR THAT IT PROBABLY WOULD HAPPEN! I THOUGHT YOU WERE GIVING ME SOME GODDAM INSURANCE POLICY THAT WOULD NEVER BE NEEDED IN A MILLION CENTURIES! W T F!"

"She's gone mad."

"I'm gone mad!? THE WHOLE FUCKING GALAXY IS GONE MAD!"

"Wait! What insurance policy?"


Of course enquiring minds want to know if Tsang was retapped to join the posse in orbit about Beowulf during the referendum. Which wouldn't be a smart thing to do given her probable emotional state right now, but it would be the consistent Solly thing to do.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Thu Sep 06, 2018 5:45 pm

cthia
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MA: Streak Boat 999
Code Name: Witch on her Stick


I admit film is responsible for a lot of my baggage.

Can you imagine Albrecht Detweiler's personal Streak Boat having this exact same Josey Wale's moment?

IOW, Albrecht Detweiler does his best Josey Wales impression. . .


OUTLAW JOSEY WALES

"Ahh! Un huh! Looka here boys. We done caught ourselves. . .
Josey Wales!"

"Is that her Bubba? Is that Miss greased lighnin' herself?"

"Yep, she is! You better watch her though, I hear she's real fast."

"Why don't you just ease that pistol right on out a mite slow, butt first. . . that's right. . .that's right."

"Oh shit, that's a graser!"

"BOOM!"

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Wed Sep 12, 2018 12:17 pm

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

Scrags are being cast in a reboot of an old Marvel comics movie.

Ex-Men.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Wed Sep 12, 2018 4:51 pm

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

That poor Dispatch Boat tasked with fetching Tsang


Hey Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by Kael Posavatz   » Wed Sep 12, 2018 7:55 pm

Kael Posavatz
Lieutenant Commander

Posts: 104
Joined: Sun Aug 05, 2018 1:51 am

cthia wrote:Scrags are being cast in a reboot of an old Marvel comics movie.

Ex-Men.

That is terrible. You should be ashamed. :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sat Sep 22, 2018 7:03 pm

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

cthia wrote:
BREAKING NEWS

A very old wiretapping of a secret meeting in the House of Lords reminiscent of the Watergate scandal of yore is found and "leaked" to the public. Parts of audio is inaudible as the subject seems to be spouting incoherent vehemence through gritted teeth...

"Have you all gone mad! That out of control lunatic simply cannot be allowed to have a seat in the Lords!"

"Why not?"

" :o "BECAUSE IT'D ONLY BE A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE THAT HOLIER-THAN-THOU JUMPED-UP BASEBORN BI—" (bleep)

"#@&%$" (bleep)

"#%$@#@##@$@#$@#$" (inaudible)

"@%&%" (bleep)

"IS LORD OF THE WHOLE PHUCKING REALM!"

cthia wrote:The heated discussion continues.

"No! No! No! Aren't you all listening?! She's a Salamader that dances on clouds with a six-legged demon on her shoulder! She's nuts I tell you! Can't you see she's nuts!"

"Stop flailing your arms. We don't know sign language."


"She did what?! We exiled her to Grayson and she cut the head clean off of a phucking Key? She's out of control I tell you! Can't you idiots see now the bitch is waaaaaaaaay out of controoooooooooooolllllllllllllllll! . . . THE BITCH IS PURE-TEE PROLONGED CRAZY!"

"We still think you're overreac—"

"She's a phucking genie with wires crossed! Blink three times you die!"

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sun Sep 30, 2018 2:07 pm

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

Oh come on! Was there anyone willing to be decent about Honor's long, ungainly legs . . .

Even the Peeps were stalking h o r s e.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Tue Oct 02, 2018 1:24 pm

cthia
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Posts: 14951
Joined: Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:10 pm

ws Bulletin . . . . . . . . News Bul

Beowulf laid it all on the line at the referendum. They put a finger on why they divorced the League.

Apparently the nasty League gave her a serious case of the runs. Then after the vote Beowulf developed an even worse case of the claps.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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