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Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.

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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Tue Dec 26, 2017 11:23 pm

cthia
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When I think of it, maybe we should give Byng a little credit. Perhaps he wasn't such an idiot after all.

The first tactic he adopted when meeting a Manty force, was to shoot while their pants were down.

"But Captain, their wedges are still down."
"You want me to wait until they raise them? FUCK THAT! Fire!"

At least Byng, personally, didn't harbor any misconceptions about Manty capabilities!

U2FUNNY!!! :lol:

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by Eagleeye   » Wed Dec 27, 2017 4:43 am

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Cthia, whatever you did eat and drink during the Xmas-days - please keep eating and drinking it! I literally rolled on the floor, loughing reading your holiday hits ... Thank you for that from the bottom of my heart!
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Wed Dec 27, 2017 3:39 pm

cthia
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Eagleeye wrote:Cthia, whatever you did eat and drink during the Xmas-days - please keep eating and drinking it! I literally rolled on the floor, loughing reading your holiday hits ... Thank you for that from the bottom of my heart!


You are very welcome Eagleeye. Thanks, also from the bottom of my heart for the compliment and for appreciating the effort. And for not suffering from a dislocated funny bone. Formatting can be a copper-plated Ransom on a project like this. Many last minute decisions can only be made after posting when I can view them in their WYSIWYG form. Therefore, a bit of post editing inevitable.

***

It was just discovered that Honor has dyslexia. She thought her name was Ohnor, which still works. So there was never any problem. How was she to know?


Militaries from the beginning of time has had their foot problems. Trench foot. Blistered foot. Cracking foot. Heat foot. Athletes foot.

The SLN is no exception. They have a foot problem too called Manty-corns. And they're always getting kicked in the ass with it.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Thu Dec 28, 2017 8:38 am

cthia
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Manticore did recover something on Mesa. They learned that everyone living on Elm Street were having nightmares for centuries and were afraid to fall asleep, fearing that they would be awakened to the face of Krueger Detweiler.

It was called Nightmares on Elm Street. Whatever you do, don't fall asleep.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:04 am

cthia
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Meanwhile, back on Old Earth amidst the Mandarins...


"The Manties are freaking magicians! They turned our launches into lunches. God only turned water into wine."

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sat Jan 06, 2018 10:34 pm

cthia
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Manticore offered to place Harahap into their Witness Protection Program. But he had already exhausted all possible new names and occupations.
Confessions of a sex slave.

"What's it like to be a sex slave?"

"Do you like being between a rock and a hard place? Well trust me, it isn't any better when the rock and the hard place is always between you."
Why does Honor wear so many hats?

Because she's always facing some sort of fallout.
It has always been a necessary evil that enemy forces endure the nausea of downward translations into N space. Yet, downward translations of enemy forces into Manticoran space has always been doubly severe. There is the nausea of the translation itself. Then there is the nausea that comes knowing you may be facing Harrington.

Downward translations into H space has always been a copper-plated bloodthirsty bitch.
Someone in the League is sticking it to Carmichael...

"Besides, you can't go around calling people idiots! Someone on Manticore IS RESPONSIBLE FOR PUTTING PAT GIVENS ON HALF PAY! Whatever idiot is responsible for that brainstorm should have had his testicles snipped and his gene pool culled!"
"No no no, Honor. You can't start smoking weed!"

"Why not Michelle?"

"Do you know what that stuff will do to your already jacked-up metabolism? It'll give you the munchies so bad you'll eat up everything, including Nimitz and McGuniess!

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Wed Jan 10, 2018 8:42 pm

cthia
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The number one candidate for shock therapy.

If the worse psychopathic regime in the history of mankind refers to you as a psychopathic killer -- AND THINKS YOU ARE SO BAD THAT THEY WANT TO KILL YOUR ENTIRE GENE POOL -- then take one lead of a battery, shove it up your anal orifice and suck on the other.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sat Jan 13, 2018 8:59 am

cthia
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ELLY AND BETH

"Well, there is something I'd like to ask you Beth."

"Go ahead Elly."

"I want to know what you really thought of me before you learned about the forged correspondence. I mean really thought of me. Come on, I heard all about that famed Winton Temper," as she hoists her shot glass of Old Tecumseh bourbon.

Elizabeth studied her. For the first time she hesitated which way to go, not knowing if Eloise was quite ready for that kind of brutal honesty. But then she turned to Ariel who gave her the green light.

"Very well. I was so pissed off with you that Justin had to restrain me from hijacking a courier, going to Noveau Paris and challenging you to a duel!"

Ariel jumped down off his perch and signed to Eloise...

<She said "I AM GOING TO BEAT THAT BITCH'S ASS!">



" :lol: :lol: :lol: "

.
Last edited by cthia on Wed Jan 24, 2018 8:54 am, edited 3 times in total.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:25 am

cthia
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Coulda-woulda-shoulda been one-liners

King Roger, "If blood must be shed, let it run Peep red."

Honor before her death rides, "Banzai!"

Just before the Protector's Own avenging launch of the murder of Honor Harrington, "We are thankful for what ye are about to receive."

Right before the Yawata strike, "TIMES UP!"

Beth, "High Ridge is the price we had to pay for God giving us the MWJ."

The Peeps, "As God is our witness, we will never go hungry again."

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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Re: Honorverse Humor or lack thereof.
Post by cthia   » Sat Jan 13, 2018 9:38 am

cthia
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It seems that Tourville erased something else that day on his flag bridge, but forgot to clear it out of his trash.

Son, your mother says I have to hang you. Personally I don't think this is a capital offense. But if I don't hang you, she's gonna hang me and frankly, I'm not the one in trouble. —cthia's father. Incident in ? Axiom of Common Sense
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